• Is using coffee as the hot water in your oatmeal speed running the fiber stuff? Because I was too lazy to heat up separate water when the coffee pot is just. Right. There.
• Giant wrench!! You see the vision!
• Which is the worse version of my mental dyslexia? Orlando Jones or Osmosis Bloom?
• Only a hoodie born of Walmart would be appropriate for such a fate
• Oh the spoon shareholders aren't gonna like that
• Or just you don't care for raw potato? Because that's normal and fine
• Also I just found out that Optimus prime is like the Pope of the transformers? Like the Jesus part was pretty obvious but I didn't realize how deep it went...
• Upon further inquiry, I may not have enough knowledge in Catholicism or transformers to know if that's the most accurate comparison
• Fine but I'm still gonna give you shit for trying to correct me on the cryptid ghost nerds
• On the radio the other day, the dj lady said "you've heard of elf on a shelf. But some people may not have heard of USING YOUR TURN SIGNAL" and then played Taylor Swift Bad Blood 💀
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